Ayumi Hamasaki

Known as the Empress of J-Pop in certain circles, Ayumi Hamasaki is almost certainly the most successful female j-pop artist to date. She’s been outsold on an album-by-album basis, but in terms of consistent success there’s nobody that can hold a candle to her right now. She was actually the first artist in Japan to have an album debut at number-one for 11 consecutive years!

It’s a mystery really. She can’t sing that well, in fact her voice is kinda bad. She can’t dance that well. In spite of lots of plastic surgery, she’s not that pretty. She doesn’t look very friendly or down to earth, in fact I’ve heard rumors of her being a bit of a diva. So why is she so successful? Search me. I’m not a fan, though I respect her accomplishments.

Born in 1978, Hamasaki spent several months running around Shibuya doing goodness knows what before being discovered in a nightclub by famous producer Max Matsuura, and the rest, as they say, is history.

In spite of her massive success, she does nothing for me personally. I have no Hamasaki songs in either my album or mp3 collection. Nevertheless there are two songs she has that I kinda liked, Seasons and Dearest, which was used as the ending song for Inuyasha (where most western fans first found out about her). Apart from those…meh. Next!

Under the Rose vol 1 manga review

Under the Rose is a rather uninspiring manga by Funato Akira. It’s the story of a young boy in Victorian England named Lloyd King whose mother Grace dies suddenly, leaving him and his young brother Lawrence at the mercy of their angry grandfather. Luckily the boys’ father, a wealthy count, decides to take them in. However Lloyd is filled with bitterness, believing that their “father” had something to with their mother’s death. Lloyd’s lonely battle for the truth begins!

Well, that’s kind of how they describe the manga. It sounded really interesting, and I liked the cover so I gave it a shot. And the result was…decidedly average. The art wasn’t bad, wasn’t good either. The storytelling was okay, more slice-of-life than average murder mystery. The author does a decent job of setting up the atmosphere and easing the readers into it, but it isn’t nearly as engrossing as, say, Kaori Mori’s Emma, mostly due to the less accomplished art.

The real failing of this manga, though, was the characters. They’re very inconsistent, sometimes likeable, sometimes not, so it’s hard to tell whether the author wants you to like or dislike them. Before long you start detesting them completely. Lloyd is the main culprit here. In the beginning you side with him, then he acts like a complete monster so you’re like uhhh…then he gets a little better (and his brothers get worse) so you’re like “he’s not all bad”, then he dissolves into a childish, ignorant, indecisive, weak, easily-swayed kid and in the end you throw your hands up in despair. Several other characters make similar swings from good to bad to good to bad again, all over the span of one volume, so before you know it you don’t care about anybody.

In any case the mystery about Lloyd and Lawrence’s mother’s death is solved in volume 1, and I don’t like the other characters much, so there’s no real point in reading any more of this series, is there? If I do so I may write other reviews, otherwise forget it. Score? 4/10.

Solomon’s Judgment

Two women came before wise King Solomon, dragging between them a young man. “This young man agreed to marry my daughter,” said one. “No! He agreed to marry MY daughter,” said the other. And so they haggled before the King, until he called for silence. “Bring me my biggest sword,” said Solomon,” and I shall hew the young man in half. Each of you shall receive a half.” “Sounds good to me,” said the first lady. But the other woman said, “Oh Sire, do not spill innocent blood. Let the other woman’s daughter marry him.” The wise king did not hesitate a moment. “This man must marry the first lady’s daughter,” he proclaimed. “But she was willing to hew him in two!” exclaimed the king’s court. “Indeed,” said wise King Solomon. “That shows she is the TRUE mother-in-law!”

First a mouse, now cockroaches

I posted a few months ago about my struggle with vermin, particularly one dirty, nasty, filthy little mouse. My final solution for that mouse, which is now an ex-mouse, was POISON. Yes, rat poison. I bought some yummy tinned sardines, mixed them up with poison and deposited them all around the house. After seeing neither hide nor hair of the blasted creature for a few days, I finally noticed a very unpleasant smell around my piano. Oh, ewww >___<

Like hell I was going to open that and see something gross and stinky. I eventually enlisted the help of brave relatives who took care of the offending carcass while I was away at work. Good riddance to bad rubbish.

Unfortunately my refuge at work has also been invaded…this time by cockroaches. I have a pretty good idea where they came from (it involves bananas bought from the market) but what matters is where they’re going now, which is the morgue, if I have anything to say about it. I’m flirting with the idea of buying a can of roach spray and spraying out my desk right before I leave work tomorrow. We’ll see. I HATE BUGS!!!

Electric Train

A few days after Christmas, a mother was working in the kitchen listening to her young son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son said, “All of you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last stop! And all of you sons of bitches who are getting on, get your asses in the train, cause we’re going down the tracks.”

The mother went nuts and told her son, “We don’t use that kind of language in this house. Now I want you to go to your room and you are to stay there for TWO HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your train, but I want you to use nice language.”

Two hours later, the son comes out of the bedroom and resumes playing with his train. Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son say, “All passengers who are disembarking from the train, please remember to take all of your belongings with you. We thank you for riding with us today and hope your trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon.” She hears the little boy continue, “For those of you just boarding, we ask you to stow all of your hand luggage under your seat. Remember, there is no smoking on the train. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today.”

As the mother began to smile, the child added, “For those of you who are pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the bitch in the kitchen.”