Tag: vermin

I posted a few months ago about my struggle with vermin, particularly one dirty, nasty, filthy little mouse. My final solution for that mouse, which is now an ex-mouse, was POISON. Yes, rat poison. I bought some yummy tinned sardines, mixed them up with poison and deposited them all around the house. After seeing neither hide nor hair of the blasted creature for a few days, I finally noticed a very unpleasant smell around my piano. Oh, ewww >___<

Like hell I was going to open that and see something gross and stinky. I eventually enlisted the help of brave relatives who took care of the offending carcass while I was away at work. Good riddance to bad rubbish.

Unfortunately my refuge at work has also been invaded…this time by cockroaches. I have a pretty good idea where they came from (it involves bananas bought from the market) but what matters is where they’re going now, which is the morgue, if I have anything to say about it. I’m flirting with the idea of buying a can of roach spray and spraying out my desk right before I leave work tomorrow. We’ll see. I HATE BUGS!!!

There’s a rat in my closet! EEEEEEEEEEEEEK! I saw it two nights ago, when I opened my bedroom door to see that filthy nasty, dirty, ugly creature running around my bowls, yuck! I have no real way of telling whether it’s a mouse or a rat, but it looked rather long and lithe, at least as big as my hand so I’m going to think it’s a rat. And then that night I left a bunch of bananas by my bedstead and when I woke up in the morning…they’d been nibbled at! Mr. Rat, these are your last days on earth. This weekend, I’m going to get some rat poison, mix it with the tastiest piece of fish I can find and put it out there for you to eat. And you’re going to eat it, and you’re going to die. Screw PETA! If they want to make themselves useful they can come pick up the dead rat body and dispose of it for me, so I ain’t touching that nasty thing. Brrr…vermin! Maybe I should call an exterminator.