Fushigi no Kuni no Sen’ichiya manga review

Also known as A Thousand and One Nights in Wonderland, Fushigi no Kuni no Sen’ichiya is Sone Masako’s ancient shoujo classic about a princess who is brought up as a prince to save her life… who later turns into a real prince and lives happily ever after with the help of his magical horse Hendek Atlatan.

That’s the cliff-notes version. It’s hard to get across in so few words just how fun and silly and heartwarming this manga is. A lot of the fun comes from the “Thousand and One Nights” part, where the author plays around with all kinds of fairy-tales and concocts new ones as she goes along. For example Snow White is actually every bit as bitchy and competitive as her stepmother, and Sleeping Beauty is actually a hideous hambeast who is convinced she’s the hottest creature on the planet (and who never gets round to falling asleep). It’s a colorful, magical world full of ghosts, fairies, dragons, immortals, magical earthworms and more.

At the center of all this is our star, Seblan. Probably the first manga character ever with full-blown Gender Dissociative Disorder. In fact, calling him a man in a woman’s body is an understatement, because he’s even more manly than his uncles he grows up with. When a ridiculously convenient dragon’s curse turns him into a man for real, he hardly skips a beat.

Throughout the series, it’s Seblan’s job to roam the world getting into one scrape or another so that his horse Hendek can rescue him with his supernatural knowledge of just about everything. There’s pretty much nothing Hendek does not know and he always manages to save the day somehow. Equus ex Machina, shall we say?

And yet they make such a great team that they’re impossible to dislike. Honest, headstrong, foolish Seblan charges into adventure with wise, longsuffering Hendek backing him up. Together they manage to pull off feat after feat of derring-do across the land. And the best part is, almost no one ever dies. I can probably count on one hand the number of bad guys who were killed off for real in the series, Seblan and Hendek usually managing to trick or trap them somehow and get their way. That’s what contributes to making it such a happy, feelgood series when it’s all said and done.

The one fly in the ointment? The characters of Milty, Seblan’s wife. Ditsy blonde with the IQ of a dead sparrow. Far too much of the series is spent on matters concerning her. First Seblan has to win her hand in marriage. Then he has to save her when she gets kidnapped. Then about 50% of the series consists of Seblan trying to convince her that babies don’t come from a stork (I could feel his blue balls from here). Eventually she gets a clue and settles down a bit, but she still managed to almost get him killed by moving his body when she was expressly told not to. What an idiot.

A fun, happy series all around though. The art is lovely too, for such an old series. I’ll be paying more attention to Sone Masako’s other stuff from now on.

Howl’s Moving Castle anime review

Howl’s Moving Castle was not quite as nonsensical as Tales from Earthsea, but it was just as boring. No, even more so.

What’s so good about Howl except his good looks?

And why did the movie have to drag on so long? It just meanders aimlessly from one event to another, then the climax scene where Sophie goes back into the past comes out of nowhere, then bam, happy ending.

Long. Boring. Annoying. Massive waste of time. Full of pointless characters and events. Seems it was based on a book, so Miyazaki felt the need to force things in where they didn’t belong, e.g. Sophie’s sister Lettie, Sophie’s mom barging her way in to see them and crap like that which could have been done away with for tighter storytelling.

The moral of the story: every problem can be solved by a kiss from a cute girl. Also girls don’t want to be hatters, they want to be housewives. And old ladies are useless, which is why even when a girl is under a spell that turns her old, when it’s time to do anything worthwhile, she’ll magically transform back into a younger stronger form without any explanation.

The war parts really don’t make any sense. And seriously, how does Howl and Sophie falling in love prompt Madame Sullivan to call off the war? Why were they fighting in the first place? What’s Howl doing up there all the time anyway? It feels like Miyazaki shoe-horned some anti-war propaganda into a story that originally had nothing to do with war, but I wouldn’t know without reading the original. Anyway, love conquers all, including stuff it has nothing to do with. Medetashi medetashi.

Calcifer was cute though.

Tales from Earthsea anime review

I’d heard Tales From Earthsea was bad, but I had no idea it was terribly boring as well.

They tried to shovel too much of the Earthsea mythos into one movie and ended up with a junky senseless patchwork. It’s been a while since I read the originals anyway, so I tried to watch it from the point of view of a complete newcomer to the series. Even then it didn’t make much sense.

Was there any real reason for Therru to be a dragon? And they go on and on about Arren’s fear (of death?) driving him crazy, but why should a 17-year old be that scared of dying? What’s gone on in his life so far that made him that way? And why steal the sword? Why kill his father in the process? And the Shadow, it arose from his fear? That’s not how it works in Earthsea! Whoops, newcomer perspective shot to pieces.

And Tenar just played a decorative role throughout. It would have been just as well if she hadn’t been there. Same with Therru, come to think of it. Heck, same with Ged/Sparrowhawk. None of them were needed in this movie, which is just about one boy learning to face his fears. You could have set it in any other world and given him some random old mentor and things would have worked out exactly the same way, or better. No wonder Ursula Le Guin commented, “It’s your movie, it’s not my book.”

The pacing was kinda odd too. Things never got really heated or exciting. There was always a dampener somewhere. Ooh, he’s getting attacked by wolves…wait no, they were run off easily. Ooh, he got kidnapped…wait no, Ged rescued him easily. Ooh, a showdown between Ged and a mind-controlled Arren…wait no, that was over in 5 seconds, followed by a sermon. Then the showdown on the rooftop stretched on so long and in so many fits and starts that it never got good. In the end, Dragonus Ex Machina, bad wizard gets fried, everyone lives happily ever after.

We don’t even get to see Arren go back and pay for his crimes like he said he would. Sure he says he’ll go, but the next time we see him he’s working on the farm like always and giggling like a schoolgirl at Ged’s stories. Uhh, are you the same prince who just murdered his dad and fled the country or was that someone else? It’s kind of ironic that a movie about the importance of life and living it ends with an unrepentant murderer laughing his ass off like there’s no tomorrow.

Last question: Therru is a dragon. What’s that got to do with the dragons that were fighting at the beginning of the series? And what about Tenar’s story about Therru’s parents burning and abandoning her, was that a lie? If yes, why? If no, huh? Why would her dragon-parents burn and leave her?

tl;dr: Tales from Earthsea is a massive mess. The art is as gorgeous as ever and I liked the soundtrack, but everything else about it was severely below average. If it hadn’t been from Studio Ghibli, something like this would never have been released in theaters.

Now for Howl’s Moving Castle.

The Cat Returns anime review

I watched Princess Mononoke (good, but seriously violent), Pom Poko (bleh) and My Neighbors the Yamadas (okay, but dull) and skipped over Spirited Away because I’d already seen it. I didn’t feel like writing reviews about them, though. Sorry.

Happily enough The Cat Returns was great! Fun, and mercifully short. Very much like a fairy tale, and the cheesy “believe in yourself” message was there from the start so it didn’t come out of nowhere. Nice simple story, funny characters, especially Muta and the King and that smarmy servant, great animation as always, decent voice acting that got the job done, everything ends very happily ever after.

It is by far the “kiddiest” of the Ghibli movies I’ve seen so far, including My Neighbor Totoro, but I love it! I was a little worried about that Machida-sempai romantic stuff in the beginning, but happily enough it came to nothing. I like romance to be at a minimum in my Ghibli series.

Ah, that was fun. Now since I’ve already watched Ponyo, I only have Earthsea, Howl’s Moving Castle and The Borrower Arriety to go. Arriety hasn’t come out on DVD in English yet, I think, so it’s just Earthsea and Howl. The Earthsea books were some of my favorite fantasy books growing up and I hear they made a mess out of that, so first I’ll get the bad stuff out of the way, and then I’ll be able to enjoy Howl as my “final taste” of Studio Ghibli. Good plan.

Update: since I wrote this review, I’ve shown this anime to several of my young nephews and nieces and their friends, at least 20 young children aged between 5 and 15, and they all love it. It’s their most-watched anime movie over all the other Ghibli stuff. Not to say that The Cat Returns is necessarily better than other Ghibli movies (though I liked it more, to be honest), but it’s certainly the most kid-friendly. It has funny animals, wacky hijinks aplently, constant action, a clear point and a happy ending. It’s easy to follow and easy to enjoy. If you’re looking to buy something for yourself, you might go with one of the other shows, but if you’re looking for something children will enjoy, definitely get The Cat Returns first.

Porco Rosso anime review

The only Ghibli movie so far that I haven’t watched until the end. It was going so well until they introduced Fio. Beautiful visuals as always, a unique protagonist, a bittersweet setting and moderate amounts of action.

I was all set to love Porco Rosso, then they had to introduce a nosy, fast-talking, high-pitched squealing girl in the form of Fio. She just wouldn’t shut up. Instead of letting us enjoy the movie ourselves, she kept butting in where she wasn’t welcome and providing unnecessary commentary where they should just have let the viewers make up their own minds. We can see the place is beautiful, thank you very much. We know Porco isn’t a bad guy, thank you very much. Ugh, who let the kid into an adult’s show?

Anyway, I quit at around the 1:15 mark and watched the last few minutes to find out what happened to everyone. What a waste of potential. Next Ghibli movie I have to watch? Pom Poko.